March 2012
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“I hope Rick Santorum and Eric go to get married but Ariel shows up and then...”
– Kaylee’s really good at this, guys.
“I hope Rick Santorum goes to the zoo to see the monkeys but he forgets his...”
– I told Brandon (in front of Kaylee) the “I hope Rick Santorum” about the penguins and suddenly Kaylee came up with this one.
Should I be proud or ashamed that I’m raising her petty?
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February 2012
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thetart:
kelsium:
Everyone please keep the wonderful mamafratelli and her two little boys in your thoughts. The babies are very small and need all the love they can get on their way into the world!
Pretty, pretty please y’all. Bota and Reddenbacher have apparently decided to join tumblr very early, because they are their mama’s children and aren’t great with rules like bake ‘till you’re...
I just spent 12 hours in bed and I'm still super...
Oh, deathcold 2012, won’t you go away?
Cornbread and Butter Beans: Jan Berenstain died... →
booyahgrandmere:
It was December 2009. I dragged Alex to Biblioball, which is a librarian-themed prom, or something similar. We were hanging out in the front of Bell House because I felt awkward and these two men came up to us and the following ensued:
Gentlemen: Why are there so many librarians here?
Me:…
Y’all need to click through and read this whole thing because it is all...
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So - There's that thing going around where you put...
Will I - Rent River - Joni Mitchell Damn These Vampires - Mountain Goats When my Boy Walks Down the Street- Magnetic Fields Lovesong - Adele Proud - Tegan and Sara Baby Got Back - Jonathan Coulton Falling In Love AGain - Nina Simone Flatbush Waltz - Itzhak Perlman Red Letter Year - Ani Difranco Famous Blue Raincoat - Tara MacLean The Rainbow Connection - Vonda Shepard Walk Through the Fire - Buffy...
K: Mommy, Pippa and I are playing a game called Win or Die!
LP: Oh? How do you play that?
K: Well ... I declare a winner, then the other person DIES!
LP: ... I'm not sure if I like this game ...
K: Wait! New rule! If the dead person stays dead too long then the winner has to start turning in a circle and singing the Ariel song. Ahhhhhh ahhhhhhhh ah ah ahhhhhhh
LP: Ok, this game has officially jumped the shark.
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I fookin lucked out in the children department.
<3
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“You sound horrible! Maybe you should take a shower and a nap.”
– That’s what I came home to do, Kaylee.
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Deathcold 2012 arrived overnight with the snow.
I was fine yesterday - hint of a scratchy throat but nothing to sneeze at (HA! PUNS! This is the state of my mind, folks), and I wake up today and I want to die. I came into work because I have a storytime at 1 but I’ve got barely a voice so I might ask someone else to do it anyway. We’ll see. I am le tired.
In the book I'm reading a guy insults the author...
fuckyeahgoodinthestacks:
librarianpirate:
As a 29 year old librarian I don’t think that’s much of an insult. Fortunately neither does this lady.
OMG IS BEING A 28 YEAR OLD LIBRARIAN A BAD THING?
She explains that he was trying to say she was acting old (hence calling her 19ish year old self 28) and uptight (hence the librarian).
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In the book I'm reading a guy insults the author...
As a 29 year old librarian I don’t think that’s much of an insult. Fortunately neither does this lady.
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annie-hall:
10 WAYS TO TELL IF YOU’RE DRUNK [via HelloGiggles]
5. You find yourself thinking, “Sweet mother of God, I would love to hear some Billy Joel right now.”
ok, no. I always want to hear some Billy Joel.
Ok, so, a couple friends from work are going to be starting a D&D game with Brandon and I and I haven’t played since college and that was a whole different edition so I’m checking some books out of the library (players manual, complete scoundrel, etc.) to bone up so I don’t seem like a noob because DARN IT I used to be good at this stuff. Anyway - do any of y’all...
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Every night at dinner we go around the table and...
I usually talk about something that I did with the girls and I talk about how their actions made me feel to promote self esteem and empathy or some such drivel.*
Tonight? My favorite part of the day? The mother effing asiago mashed potatoes.
*I don’t think it’s drivel.
I am the parent every body hates
Because that person who just walked past Brandon and Pippa in skipping in the parking lot? With Pippa’s curl’s flying in the wind as she screams, “I’m FLYING! I’m FLYING!” That person did NOT smile adoringly at them and I kinda wanted to say, “excuse me but WHAT THE EFF IS WRONG WITH YOU?”
(I have issues)
texts from Brandon
Kaylee: "Why do all churches always have lower case Ts on them?"
....
....
[conversation ends with]
OP "Well, some people think he [God] is real and some people think he is make believe"
Kaylee: "Hmmm ok... well, and do some people think that he is an alien?"
OP: "Actually.. yes, some people do believe that."
Kaylee: "Oh... THOSE PEOPLE ARE SO WEIRD."
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“Mommy made me cry! Mommy hurt my feelings! There are sticky tears all OVER my...”
– This was Pippa’s response to me telling her that she can’t come with me when I go to work.
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whiskeyrobot replied to your photo: Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to get…
how did you do this?!?!? I must know for reasons
I cut a small heart out of tape, used that as a stencil on my thumb to make the gold heart then put the heart itself on my ring finger and painted the whole thing gold. That one smudged quite a bit when I pried up the piece of tape but I just filled in...
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Parenting question
So let’s say the floor is lava and let’s say that a hypothetical eldest child is on their fifth or sixth last warning. If she needs to be sent to bed early, how awful is it to make her walk across the lava?
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france: ten
france: twenty
france: thirty
france: forty
france: fifty
france: sixty
france:
france:
france: sixty ten
world: france what are you do—
france: four twenties
world: france stop it
france: four twenties ten
world: france that doesn't even make any sense
france:
france:
france:
world:
france:
world:
france: hundred.
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OOOOH, YOU DID NOT JUST DISPARAGE WONDER WOMAN IN...
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE HOLD MY EARRINGS?